I have known you for more than three years already and I can say that I know you skin deep. There are things that we might encounter and some of that are mean spirited. But that's given. It's normal. I know you know what I mean and there is nothing more that I can say. I know how you're feeling right now and for the time that I have known you, you have shown to me what a real friend is. No pretentions. Just being ourselves. And I am more than proud to say that you are a very good friend. And that will never change.

Always remember... we are not here to please everybody. Keep those people who have learned to accept you and don't put too much attention on the rest. And again... I am always here if you need someone to talk to... to cry on... to party with.... to shop with... anything. Don't be too hard on yourself now. I know you're strong and you'll definitely get through this.

We your friends love you Mikey. Always think of that!

P.S.
We are still going to this party this coming weekend. No excuses!

Mwah!

Chestita Koleda i Shtastliva Nova Godina
Glædelig Jul og godt nytår
Colo sana wintom tiebeen
Vrolijk Kerstfeest en een Gelukkig Nieuwjaar!
Rõõmsaid Jõulupühi ja Head uut aastat
Hyvää Joulua or Hauskaa Joulua - 0nnellista uutta vuotta
Joyeux Noël et Bonne Année!
Fröhliche Weihnachten und ein glückliches Neues Jahr!
Kala Christougenna Ki'eftihismenos O Kenourios Chronos
Mele Kalikimaka & Hauoli Makahiki Hou
Naimbag a Pascua ken Naragsac nga Baro nga Tawen!
Selamat Hari Natal & Selamat Tahun Baru
Idah Saidan Wa Sanah Jadidah
Shinnen omedeto. Kurisumasu Omedeto
Sung Tan Chuk Ha
Pax hominibus bonae voluntatis
Milad Saeed wa Sanaa Mubarakah
Linksmu Kaledu ir laimingu Nauju metu
Kung His Hsin Nien bing Chu Shen Tan
Eg ynskjer hermed Dykk alle ein God Jul og Godt Nyttår
Boas Festas e um feliz Ano Novo
Feliz Navidad y Próspero Año Nuevo
God Jul och Gott Nytt År
Maligayang Pasko at Manigong Bagong Taon
Malipayong Pasko ug Bulahang Bag-ong Tuig!
Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year

I am so full of negative feelings today. And I don't know why. Crazee thoughts are floating inside my head and it's not doing any good at all. All of these thoughts are starting to pile up like a huge boulder in front of me, stopping me to move forward. I am stuck in this limbo and I don't know how to get out of it. I'm tired. I'm simply tired of everything. I'm tired with work but I just can't quit. I'm tired of partying but I just can't quit. I'm tired of fooling around but I just can't quit. I'm tired of stressing out myself but I just can't quit.

See? It's clear that I am a complete slave of myself. I am losing control with what is it that I really want and just living a life as my environment dictates me how. Have you ever thought of this as well? Or did it even cross your mind? Having a feeling that you're totally free but you are not? You thought you have a complete control of your life but deep inside what you have been doing and living is not your choice but someone else's choice for you? That you thought having a good salary can make you happy and give you all the satisfaction at work when in fact it's not?

Oh boy I'm in deep shit. This is not a good year ender for me and I thought at the start of the last quarter of this year everything will turn out to be perfect. Wrong answer Paul... it's just the beginning of living a life full of hell... This is just an opening salvo. I know I have been giving out all these shit just to cover with I really feel. Honestly? I really don't know what is it that I want to happen in my life. I am living each day as it is. I am a person with no plans at all in the future. I live by day. Day in and day out. I'm completely lost and it's eating me whole.

I'm scared. I am really scared that one day I will wake up and not knowing myself at all. No sense of being. I will end up staring at someone I don't know in front of the mirror. Lifeless. No light. Just like the rest. Battling with yourself is way too difficult that battling with the people around you. Your worst enemy is your self.

Alcohol has been my escape lately. Don't get me wrong here... I know it's a temporary escape route but it works for me... not for long though. Just for the night. Useless.

I guess I will never find myself. Lost in the woods and is being haunted by the big bad wolf. Run red riding hood... run!

I'm bored. Sleepy. Eyes are droopy. Wanted to party but duty calls. Ugh! I'm a slave. Instead, I have uploaded some new pics here during Rochelle's wedding last December 8, 2006.

Somebody save me from here! Help! I don't want to end up pumping rounds of bullets to anyone I see here at work. I'm tired. I'm drained. I'm useless. What a worst Holiday ever.

OMG! I can't believe I received this comment message from Khalel...

"Congratulations, youve been nominated in the G* Spot weblog Award for the Story Blog Category (week 3)

There are five of you nominated for this week from all over the world.

for more details, log on to
www.khalelian.blogspot.com


Goodluck!"

Seriously, I have never thought my blog will be nominated or something. I am only doing this for fun and to let some of my friends know what's been happening with my life. It may be boring or not.

But since it's there... hope you guys will visit Khalel's blog and vote for your Queer here. The attention whore!

Love ya all! Mwah!

Wow! It took me like a week before I could update my blog regarding the recent trip I had with friends/colleagues. It's just that I'm in deep shit right now with work. My feng-shui is so terrible at work and why would it happen as the year ends? Talking about perfect timing. I should not discuss about work this time, and instead, I will post some of the pictures we took during the said vacation. I will dedicate on post about how shitty my life at work is.

So there, if not because of Rochelle's wedding in Cagayan De Oro City, we won't be having this long weekend. And as what I have mentioned before, this will be our first time in CDO. Lexie and I have decided to extend the break and instead, travel all the way to Davao right after the wedding. Finally, we can remove Davao from our list this year.

We left for CDO last December 7, 2006 and we took the Super Ferry. Lexie and I hated travelling with lots of passengers actually and exactly the reason why we have agreed to get their suite room since we know that it's only good for two. It's not that we don't trust the people around us but we're too cautious about our stuff. Hehehehehe... We arrived on a Friday at 6 in the morning and as you can see, we are trying to feel that it's one of those long haul trips.

CDO

That's me in the red back pack carrying our barongs and Lexie on his fuck-me-red hand carry bag... Love it!!

Right outside their port area. Waiting for our ride...

We just can't resist the charms of Barbie when we went to their Limketkai Mall. I was amazed they have a shop full of Barbies!!! We have to follow the pose of course...

Toys for big boys or big girls? You decide!

Moi, Rochelle the bride, Lexie and Mika. We are the original group that have decided to enjoy life by travelling. And sad to say, Rochelle dearie will have to make a pass on that... better stay fit for the baby. And to think she's our blue baby. Talking about pill-popping-party-pooper-girl! Mwah!

Straight? Guess not! Bwahahahahahaha... The future politicians of this country!

ROAD TRIP TO DAVAO!

The day after the wedding, we have to leave early from CDO to travel all the way to Davao. Well, the call time of 5 am was move to like 7 am. Lexie, Mika and I went out after the reception and have decided to drown ourselve with booze. When I say drown, it's like drinking till we all pass out. We went to this bar called Eleven 50 and I was amazed by it. It's like the combo of VUDU/THE LOFT/TONIC. Amazing! I even forgot to count how many glasses of weng-weng I ordered that night and I can say I was really drunk. And happy since I was surrounded by gays/bis that are hoping to get a shag with a stranger. Well, I flirted but nothing really happened. Hehehehehe... We almost got hit by a cab when we went out due to alcohol and we're all just laughing our hearts out. We went home around 4 in the morning. And by the way, Mika slept in the CR. Bwahahahahaha...

Lexie and I are still drunk in this group picture when we passed by Bukidnon. I can still smell the alcohol inside me and I hate it. And as you would notice, Mika is not around. He's actually outside the van, puking. Way to go!

We arrived Davao around 2 in the afternoon already. Too tired and dying to get some rest. We checked in at Royal Mandaya and I love that Hotel. But it would have been better if it's in Marco Polo. Ugh! I just hate being poor. We partied, Saturday night... drunk again... met someone on the first night... and yes, this time I got laid... met up with my half-sister and her family... dine out... drunk again... and on our third day, we decided to have an educational trip. Funny but we have enjoyed it!

Welcome to Eden Park! This is more of a family picture. I just hate we can't smoke anywhere... We're dying in that City literally.

And this is the first time I've done horse back riding. I would like you to meet Randy. He loves to poop while roaming around the park. Bwahahahahaha....

For the love of god! Please avoid the Indiana Jones thingee right after horse back riding. This is one perfect way of torturing your balls and removing the possibility of having a baby of your own in the near future. AGONY!.

Right after Eden Park, we went to their crocodile farm. And this is the first time I've held a croc and now I want to have a croc skin shoes. Or wallet. Hahahahaha...

And just last Tuesday, we flew back to Cebu. Back to reality. Back to work. No more room service. But then, at least we did enjoy our long weekend. And I have to admit, I left a part of me in Davao. And oh yeah... now I can say that being in a strange place can bring your sexual urges back.

Something special happened to me as well. Met someone, had some exchange of ideals in life (aside from semen... bwahahahaha) and he's kinda sweet. And he's flying here next month to spend some time with me. Here we go again, kinda hoping for something. But I need to be careful this time. Long distance relationship is a big LIE! It sucks and it won't do you any good. Let me just enjoy what I have for now.

Gotta get back to work now. I forgot I still got some shit to clean here in the office. UGGGHHHHH!!!

After how many days of stressful work here in the Office, I will be leaving for Cagayan De Oro later tonight to attend a wedding by tomorrow. Then, I'm off to Davao Saturday morning and will be spending three days and three nights in that lovely city. It will be my first time to visit those lovely places.

I guess I deserve this after all. Relaxing vacation down south with some friends from work. I don't care how much we're going to spend so long as we'll enjoy this break.

And this time, I will be seeing new faces... and I know it's tiring to see the same faces if you're out at night partying. Oh well... might as well not expect too much. I don't want to get some disappointments out from this vacation.

Blogging will resume on Wednesday next week with some updates and pictures... Wish me luck!

To Patxie... I'm sorry. I'm really really sorry. I have never considered you as one of my boys. I have treated you specially and my friends here in Cebu knew about that. What I have showed you is real.

But did you know that I have been battling with myself regarding my feelings for you? Did you know that everytime you will talk to me asking some advices regarding you and your partner I'm not happy and all ears? And remember the time you texted me informing me that you're in the hospital since your partner is having an allergy attack and your mom accompanied you guys? You wanna know how I was feeling? I felt bad, jealous, hopeless, and in pain. And that never stopped me from missing you.

And now that you have read my blog... and you're feeling a bit disappointed about all the stuff you've read... I am sorry. But I will never be sorry for what I have felt for you.

After this night... with all the things I have said here... I am hoping that you will understand me.

And if you will decide to end what we have started... then I will understand. Whatever happens... I will always be here for you Patxie.

Pooh will definitely miss you.

KINGDOM OF PRETTY!

Oh well... I have been listening to this feel good music lately from Bonnie Bailey and I can say that this will be the new "Ever After". Love the beat... love the lyrics... And I don't know why but I feel so loved and high when I'm listening to it. Thanks to my friend Mikey for uploading the said single in my blog. I hope you too bitches will love the song.

KINGDOM OF PRETTY
Bonnie Bailey

STROLLIN THROUGH
ELYSIAN FIELDS WITH YOU
OUR LUSH
FIRST HYPNOTIC PHASE
COOING WORDS MELTIN
ICE GLACIERS KEEP ME
TURNING TO THE NEXT PAGE

YOU FEEL FAMILIAR
A COMFORT THAT COMES WITH YEAR
SSPARKLES FLUSH MY SKIN EYES SWELL UP IN TEARS
AS I TRACE YOUR FOOTSTEPS AROUND THE WORLD
CRUSHIN OVER YOU LIKE A LITTLE GIRL
I FLUTTER AMONG THE BUTTERFLIES

CHORUS

EVERDAY IS OUR FIRST TIME FOR SOMETHING NEW
AS COMPELLING AS YOU ARE TO ME I AM TO YOU
CURIOSITY HAS ME PEEKING THROUGH
YOUR KINGDOM OF PRETTY

A FORMLESS FLOW A MAGICAL SYMPHONY
CONSUMED BY THE FRAGRANT POSSIBILITIES
CURIOSITY HAS ME PEEKING THROUGH
YOUR KINGDOM OF PRETTY

YOU'RE SO PRETTY

YOU'RE SO PRETTY

*just click on the play button below the message board... toodles!